.

she looks like the real thing
she tastes like the real thing
my fake plastic love
but I can't help the feeling
i could blow through the ceiling
if I just turn and run

it wears her out, it wears her out

~fake plastic trees by radiohead

oh hai.

http://www.lifelounge.com/forums/default.aspx?g=posts&m=9455

s.p.

the floor was a magnet.
my eyes strained but
the rational part of me focused on
her figure shadowed by the door.
she asked me what was wrong
or maybe she was telling me it would be okay.

in truth, i did not really believe her
rather, i believed myself when i thought
"it'll be okay"

the feeling was similar
yet still very different
i was not altogether prepared for it
but i guess we never are.

i closed my eyes
breathed
and eventually it stopped.

thank god.

edit: it has been confirmed that this was not a dream. i hadn't been sure, but it was real.

kay.

http://djtiesto01.blogspot.com/2007/10/dj-tiesto-trkiye-konseri-resimleri.html

for hanz pt. II.

the build up to about 3:00 is worth it, and it just gives a music-ful overload from there on.





this song always makes me
!!!!!!
and always makes me dance

it reminds me of the san francisco drum circle
where i should have danced

we couldn't tear our eyes away from her
and we couldn't pull our hearts away from the pulse of the drums.

but i didn't.

so now i will always dance.

uncontrollable.

this song makes me cheesy and lovey and rave-y
so

love yourself
love lovely people
dance (which i am doing between bouts of typing right now)

but mostly
don't waste time doing things you hate.

'cause sometimes i guess you have to do things you don't like. thats unavoidable.

but
let this song seep into your skin
and maybe we can all understand, if even for a few minutes.

for hanzel.

http://www.brookenipar.com/diary/index/0/0/0/0/3

.

was there a man,
was there ever a man on this earth
who could say he was happy,
who knew happiness, true happiness,
not an image, a dream,
an illusion, a vision, which could disappear?
your example...
your example, your fate, your disaster,
show us that none of us mortals
ever knew, ever felt what happiness truly is.

~Sophocles' Oedipus Rex/ Oedpius Tyrannus

fah q.

http://forwearemany.wordpress.com/

my heart is not normal

i dont know what i want





nothing feels right.

which i think makes my heart completely normal.

i am fated to pretend

"these moments - as beautiful as they are...they're evil once they're gone."

no regrets!

Ice-age heat wave, can't complain.
If the world's at large, why should I remain?
Walked away to another plan.
Gonna find another place, maybe one I can stand.
I move on to another day,
to a whole new town with a whole new way.
Went to the porch to have a thought.
Got to the door and again, I couldn't stop.
You don't know where and you don't know when.
But you still got your words and you got your friends.
Walk along to another day.
Work a little harder, work another way.

Well uh-uh baby I ain't got no plan.
We'll float on maybe would you understand?
Gonna float on maybe would you understand?
Well float on maybe would you understand?

The days get shorter and the nights get cold.
I like the autumn but this place is getting old.
I pack up my belongings and I head for the coast.
It might not be a lot but I feel like I'm making the most.
The days get longer and the nights smell green.
I guess it's not surprising but it's spring and I should leave.

I like songs about drifters - books about the same.
They both seem to make me feel a little less insane.
Walked on off to another spot.
I still haven't gotten anywhere that I want.
Did I want love? Did I need to know?
Why does it always feel like I'm caught in an undertow?

The moths beat themselves to death against the lights.
Adding their breeze to the summer nights.
Outside, water like air was great.
I didn't know what I had that day.
Walk a little farther to another plan.
You said that you did, but you didn't understand.

I know that starting over is not what life's about.
But my thoughts were so loud I couldn't hear my mouth.
My thoughts were so loud I couldn't hear my mouth.
My thoughts were so loud.

~the world at large by modest mouse






i ain't got no plan
we'll float on maybe would you understand?

element

i like driving long distances cause it makes me feel like i'm going somewhere

for the past month i have not been myself
i have had no personality
an empty shell
but

i hadn't realized i had lost myself.

or maybe i thought it didn't matter?

it's ironic
because i think the opposite was supposed to happen
(when that happened)



i feel like i am finally myself again
been a little reckless
more outgoing
dancing
but not ballet
a little bitter
some people are assholes
but
sometimes it's beautiful to have something
sad
happen to you
because it can remind your heart
who you are.

("I have my fits but feeling is good")

the endless summer has returned
and it feels


pretty.

damn.

good.

((((

i kept putting it farther back
when i easily could have replaced it with
the one that was closer
which
in theory would have made things easier
on me
but
i still didn't do it.
some things never change?
some things we never make change.

my eyes went out of focus
and
i let them.

))))

i was confused by this line at first.

"Happiness hit her like a bullet in the head
Struck from a great height by someone who should know better than that"





but now i think i understand.

hai

"you forgot about the things that he could say like
i dont think that I like you anymore
well I found new feelings at the feeling store
and I cant find you at our kissing place
and im scared of those new pair of eyes you have"

~banshee beat by animal collective

well i found new feelings at the feeling store

i am your butterfly, be my protector be my protector

im finding inspiration in the
uninspiring things
'beauty in the breakdown'
i've learned a lot about indifference
at first it is quite possibly the worst feeling
to have directed towards you
but then you kind of become indifferent to indifference
and a weird sort of calm
a crazed calm
sets in
strangely more focused
and feeling like there is nothing to lose
but maybe some things to gain

and then you slowly feel your heart
returning
passion is still on hiatus
but



its still something.

yeah, you fucking should have.

"okay if i say somethin now?"

"...
go ahead..."

"i shoulda danced with ya..."

"...good night...
...good night."



~as good as it gets

.

"whatever tragedies we experience, it only takes us 30 seconds to summarize them once they're over."

~danielle fletcher

happiness hit her like a train on the track

run fast for your mother, run fast for your father
run for your children, for your sisters and brothers
leave all your love and your longing behind
you cant carry it with you if you want to survive

call sign: swan

how did we get from there to here
i wonder where we are in the possible worlds







"swans sing songs all night long,
who knew how warm the islands would be?
and who knew just how much the
sky covers me?
makes you forget what it means to be free..."

okay eternity

why the fuck are you so hot

..

But I won't follow you
Into the rabbit hole
Last night I woke
But then I saw
The ship of woes
But didn't want me to

"i'm having a moment, don't mess with me"

also, i love emma watson's new haircut

music

you are too beautiful

thank you.










although sometimes you make me feel too full.

terrible love

.

itsworthittrustme

"keep it going, mahler, you son of a bitch. keep it going..."

~bukowski

all i've ever had..redemption songs

http://vi.sualize.us/view/heartofglass/7fb8e8a324ac19b9ce7e6e25b1329e6e/

m.

yo bitches

man up
or trance up

mother, forget me now that the creek drank the cradle you sang to.

~ iron and wine

i'll quit later

...

with my lightning bolts aglowin' i can see where i am going to be

i said my life was missing a plush horse purse

i guess this means my life is complete.

edit: life is complete now that my cartilage is pierced.

(until my next piercing, that is.)

“It is true: we love life, not because we are used to living but because we are used to loving."

–nietzsche, thus spoke zarathustra

where you gonna be?
where will you spend eternity?
i'm gonna be perfect from now on
i'm gonna be perfect starting now...

randy described eternity~ built to spill

apparently im eight years late

but better late than never, right?

how

http://www.ryanmcginley.com/photographs


it started with a pair of boots.

" ' I know this much, is all,' Franny said. 'If you're a poet, you do something beautiful. I mean you're supposed to leave something beautiful after you get off the page and everything. The ones you're talking about don't leave a single, solitary thing beautiful. All that maybe the slightly better ones do is sort of get inside your head and leave something there, but just because they do, just because they know how to leave something, it doesn't have to be a poem, for heaven's sake. It may just be some kind of terribly fascinating, syntaxy droppings - excuse the expression. Like Manlius and Esposito and all those poor men.' "

~ Franny, Franny and Zooey by Salinger

my friends are beautiful

~minion mina courtesy of ninja gianna

syvlie guillem is not real life

except she is.

and when it was over
i could not decide if i wanted
to laugh
cry
or just plain throw up.
i used one of my two preferred sedatives
music
and flowed on.

everything is clogged
and your insides burst out
through your tongue
i lose all sense
of sense
and can only stand

and realize

i drink too much
and write too little.
i think too much
and act too little.
i care too much
and care too little.
so
i scoff at aristotle's empty promise

and besides,

maybe the point is not happiness
but passion.

"look out the world's destroying ya. relax, it isn't fair."

~liar by built to spill